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Besides: Effortless rejection is one of online dating's great achievements.

Escaping...a bad first date: Dinner is too much of a time commitment and coffee is for work associates, so you're asking her to have a drink with you.

Have whoever's shooting step back just enough to get a three-fourths shot of your body."Urbinati: "White can wash out in photos, so if you're in shape, a simple well-fitting crew tee or Henley in gray is flattering and effortless.

To look more put together, try dark jeans, a slim-collar shirt, and a well-tailored suit jacket in gray—it reads more casual than black, less preppy than navy."Displaying your guts by completing questions like "On a typical Friday night I am..." and "I'm really good at..." will make you feel self-conscious and absurd— and that's normal.

See, your profile isn't meant to make a stranger fall in love with you.

Once you're sitting in front of her with the less-than- 15-percent hair loss that she's handicapped your photo for, then you can really get to know each other—as two hormone-leaking, masochistic adults who want so badly to be in love again._—Mary H. Choi _You want to say you're an oenophile or fluent in Klingon? The beauty of online dating is that it's stocked with people on the ends of the bell curve—the kind you'd never find normally.

Mention a few TV shows, movies, bands, and books you enjoy, but take it easy on the esoteric poetry, eight-year-old Bay Area rap lyrics, and the word I.Also, there's a specific place for you to talk up your hobbies, and it's not your handle, ILike Sexn Soccer. (And if they were, Ding Dong 9Inch Wong would take it every year.) All a username has to convey is "I'm not crazy." Your profile can take it from there.Wouldn't this same sentiment—"I enjoy playing soccer in the park, and an active sex life is important to me"—sound less caveman-ish in your actual profile? Davidson: "People need to see your face, but shooting up close with a wide-angle lens makes your nose look bigger.Don't just ignore her message—text her and explain directly (but gently) that it just didn't click for you. When I finally logged on, I found out that they were right: It's all of that. The number of profiles I could scroll through was overwhelming.It was a Whole Foods of my own sexual imagination—and I was shopping on an empty stomach.

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Relax, don't overthink it, and remember that what you're putting up is the equivalent of first-date banter.

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